Posts in Uncategorized
FML

True story. As recovered from an old email to Felix on the tearful Tuesday after Bestival 2009. Scene: this morning, JD in cafe, talking to Woman

JD: Good morning W: Morning JD: Tea please, milk, one sugar. W: Milk, one sugar. Anything else? JD: Yes. A croissant, lightly toasted, with marmalade. W: Jam. JD: No, marmalade please. W: Jam. JD: Marmalade. W: Jam. JD: I don't want jam, I want marmalade. W: Jam. JD: That's not the same thing. I asked for marmalade. W: We don't have marmalade. JD: Fine. Jam then. W: [in smarmy voice] Jam it is. And a coffee. JD: No. A tea. Milk. One sugar. [pause as Woman goes to make it]

I'm going to leave it there, it gets too upsetting.

.

C'était un Rendez-vous

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0DSyEarRAKo] Put on some headphones, hit full-screen and press play.

The guy. Does not. Stop. (until 8.00)

Shot in a single take, this is a classic example of cinéma-vérité. The length of the film was limited by the short capacity of the 1000 foot 35mm film reel, and filmed from a (supposedly) gyro-stabilised camera mounted on the bumper of a Mercedes-Benz 450SEL 6.9.

It's amazing to look at the other cars as the driver passes them. And the streets are so empty (probably as much because of the time of day it was filmed at.

Also a big fan of the fact that the Google-ad on it is for "speeding offence lawyers" and laser eye surgery.

Thanks Ed!

Oh god... (or at least some of them)

Some British, Scottish, Irish, Welsh Gods & Goddesses: Amaethon (Welsh) - God of Agriculture, Master of Magic

Arawn (Welsh) - God of the Hunt and the Underworld

Arianrhod (Welsh) - Star and Sky Goddess, Goddess of Beauty, Full Moon and Magical Spells

Badb (Irish) - Goddess of War, Death and Rebirth

Caillech (Scottish, Irish, Welsh) - Goddess of Weather, Earth, Sky, Seasons, Moon and Sun

Cliodna (Irish, Scottish) - Goddess of Beauty and of Other Realms

Creide (Irish, Scottish) - Goddess of Women and Fairies

The Green Man (Welsh) - God of the Woodlands, of Life Energy and Fertility

Morgan LeFay (Welsh) - Goddess of Death, Fate, the Sea and of Curses

Oghma (Scottish, Irish) - God of Communication and Writing, and of Poets

Rhiannon (Welsh) - Goddess of Birds, Horses, Enchantments, Fertility and the Underworld

Skatha (Welsh) - Goddess of the Underworld, Darkness, Magic, Prophecy and Martial Arts

Ten more tips for writers

These ten tips from Richard Ford. He won the Pullitzer Prize for his novel Independence Day (not the one with Will Smith and Jeff Goldblum in it, a different one).

1 Marry somebody you love and who thinks you being a writer's a good idea.
2 Don't have children.
3 Don't read your reviews.
4 Don't write reviews. (Your judgment's always tainted.)
5 Don't have arguments with your wife in the morning, or late at night.
6 Don't drink and write at the same time.
7 Don't write letters to the editor. (No one cares.)
8 Don't wish ill on your colleagues.
9 Try to think of others' good luck as encouragement to yourself.
10 Don't take any shit if you can ­possibly help it.

"When I woke in the dark this morning, my heart pounding like a tom-tom, it seemed to me as though a change were on its way, as if this dreaminess tinged with expectation, which I have felt for some time now, were lifting off of me into the cool tenebrous dawn." - The Sportswriter